Victorian sky

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Posts by Victorian sky

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  15

  I might be going back to the kingdumb hall !!

  by boy@crossroads in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i'm thinking about going back to the meetings.

  hopefully just sunday meetings for awhile.

  not because i want to or that i feel any inward guilt to return.

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  Victorian sky

  Been there, done that, please DON'T DO IT! When I lived at home with my mom, she begged me to at least go to the Sunday meetings. I thought, it's not much to ask, I'm living under her roof, can't afford to move out, it's the least I can do for her. So I felt obligated to go. It was torchure. A few times I just sat in the kg hall parking lot with my hands gripping the steering wheel, in tears because I didn't want to go in there. When I did go, i'd daydream, write scenes for a script i was writing but when i couldn't zone out, the drivel from the platform was mind numbing. I felt like an imposter and a hypocrite. It got to the point where I got dressed for the meeting, got close to the hall and kept on driving! Then I'd make up some excuse and say I felt sick, which was so true. Look, you're an adult, nobody here can tell you what to do. But if they are moving in to your place why do you have to be the one to conform? If they know you're inactive, I wonder what's going on with them? Maybe they're trying to escape to. There's a quote by Mandella, something about, if you live free you give others around you permission to free themselves too. Maybe they need your example to have the courage to leave. Live strong and God Bless - V Sky
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  11

  How Long Did it Take You

  by XBEHERE in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i just looked at my avatar after i made my 500th post here and realized that i have officially signed up on this forum 3 1/2 yrs ago but was lurking for several months prior to that.

  now 500 posts isnt that much for over 3 yrs and i am still a jw in "good" standing while so many of you have come here, left, and moved on already.

  so how long did it take you to leave after coming here?

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  Victorian sky

  A month after my last meeting, I found this site and it's been a God send. It helped me heal. I read for a while before I posted, at first I was so afraid I would say something that would give my identity away, I didn't want to lose JW family and 'friends'. Now 3 years later, the fear is long gone. I am so happy to be free. For all who are still in, I empathize and wish you all the best. - V Sky
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  31

  Just checking in: Life is GREAT and I'm SO HAPPY

  by berylblue in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  as an ex-jw.. for those of you who are wondering if there is life beyond the wtbts -.

  yes, there is.. a very fulfilling, exciting, satisfying life.. i am now a store manager candidate for a national pharmacy chain - will have my own store within 6 months - .

  my grandson is beautiful and both my children are in constant contact.. i will be getting married to a wonderful man in a few months - and.

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  Victorian sky

  B, Congrats! I know what you mean about the daily joy of freedom. I've never appreciated life more. As a JW I was a hamster on a wheel, running from task to task - meetings, service, conventions, more, more, more. I wasn't helping people or going anywhere. Now I feel as if I can do anything - pursue the hopes and dreams I ruthlessly suppressed, the weight of the daily dub grind is long gone. Everyday is a brand new world, another chance to live and love authentically, to live my truth. Life is so precious and I'm going to enjoy every second of it. I'm so happy for you. God Bless - V Sky
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  42

  I left!!!!

  by Hawkeye in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  this is my first posting on jwd!

  i wrote out my disassociation letter.

  i am sending many in the congregation copies of my letters exposing the fine "elders".

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  Victorian sky

  Hawkeye, welcome! You're not alone, if you ever need to vent, we're here. God bless - V Sky
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  19

  Oscars - did your favorite win?

  by pratt1 in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i agreed with all of the winners at last night's oscar's except for the best actor award.. i would have given it to joquin phoenix.

  i thought his performance as johnny cash was great.. i also thought that jon stewart did a great job.

  i particularily liked the opening skits.

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  Victorian sky

  Loved when Crash won for best picture, well deserved. The pimp song stole the show, we laughed and cheered when they won. I thought the show was dull compaired to previous years. Where's Billy Crystal when you need him? Hated Naomi Watts and Michelle Williams' dresses, loved Jessica Alba, Uma Thurman and Salma Hayeks style. Best speech was Reese and Phillip Seymor thanking his single parent mom, that was really sweet.
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  44

  Is there a God/supreme being/ or what?!

  by DigitalFokus in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  ok, so i was raised luthren, my dad was cathlioc and then i went dub for 5 years and since have been completely turned off religion.

  the dub experience combined with world events and my personal ones have pretty much pushed all thoughts of a "almighty" out of my mind.

  of course there are times that i think of religion or get into a "2am religion talk" and i wonder wtf is really going on.

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  Victorian sky

  There's a quote in The Count of Monte Cristo - 'You may not believe in God but God believes in you'. When I first left JWs I didn't want anything to do with God, The Bible or religion, period. I was so turned off. My grandmother encouraged me to watch Joel Osteen on tv and finally i did. He's got a really positive non-threatening message. I started to pray and read just the Bible. Three years later, I'm happy and at peace. I don't have all the answers but I know Jesus is real and he loves you more than you can imagine. If you want, check out calvarychapel.com. - God Bless, V Sky
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  64

  FRANCE-WTS BIG SCANDAL IF TRUE

  by DannyHaszard in

  1. watchtower
  2. scandals

  vendors of paradise in district xvi

  cafe babel - strasbourg,france .

  jehovahs witnesses are often criticised.

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  Victorian sky

  Wow, their hypocrisy is unbelievable. So it's okay for these poor brothers in 3rd world countries to die for political neutrality as long as the gb make a little money on the side. If there is a burning hell there's a spit with their name on it.
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  19

  How long did it take for the fog to lift?

  by Honesty in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i was inactive for almost 2 years, not attending meetings or reading any watchtower publications before i felt the fog start to lift from my mind and i could truly think.

  how long did it take for you?

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  Victorian sky

  I faded 3 years ago, I've come a long way. Now I'm finally in a good place - spiritually & emotionally. It takes time. In some ways, i'm still healing but i've made peace with the past 'cause like it or not, the JWs helped shape who I am today. Now I'm the governing body's worst nightmare - a woman with a brain! I have the blessed freedom to think for myself and that makes life exhilarating, an adventure around every corner, clear skies ahead. - V Sky
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  30

  To Fade or Not Fade

  by daniel-p in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  so it's been five months that i've been on jwd and i've made a lot of progress.

  first i want to thank everyone, wholeheartedly, for the encouragement i've recieved here.

  when i first posted i was still an ms, and being used in the cong.

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  Victorian sky

  DP, you are taking a spiritual stand. It takes guts to be true to yourself, to examine your belief system, to use your brain and act with your heart, that kind of courage is rare among the 'brothers' of the org. Your wife doesn't want any of them, she wants you so even though you're changing shower her with the love and affection many dub wives are starved for. Be a better husband to her now and she'll wonder, what is up with you? Maybe she'll ask questions. It may take time so be patient with her and with yourself. God bless - V Sky
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  25

  Hello!

  by shera13 in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i admit i have been a lurker for a few months and now i can finally talk to u guys!

  i want to thank you guys for your honesty on this site and your humor...my husband and i formally dissassociated ourselves from the darling watchtower a few months ago and your site helped us keep our chins up!

  we particularly enjoy blondies weekly commentaries on the watchtower articles!

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  Victorian sky

  Welcome Maria! I know the transition out of the org is hard and at times painful but you're not alone. You and your husband have eachother and you have all of us. We'll be your friends with no conditions. Hang in there, it gets much better. - V Sky